My Internal Struggles

When I decided to convert it was such an internal struggle.  On one hand I wanted and believed in freedom of religion and on the other hand I felt like choosing to leave my current religion was TREASON.

So after many sleepless nights filled with tears , sadness  and struggling with my feelings of wanting to become Jewish, I started talking to friends, Family and colleagues about my decision.  One of my colleagues suggested that I seek out a Rabbi.  Well this was something I wanted to do without a Rabbi, especially after watching the "Sex and the City" episode and seeing how difficult the Rabbi made it for Charlotte to convert.  

But after realizing I couldn't get around without a Rabbi I went to speak with one that was highly recommended.  To my pleasant surprise the Rabbi was so welcoming, kind and honest.  After meeting with him I knew this was the right decision for me.  He suggested that I start taking a Derekh Toran class at the 92nd street Y.

I was always told never to convert for marriage, and when I was interviewed before I could signed up for this class, the Rabbi on the other end of the phone asked me several times why and what my intentions were for converting.  I understood the importance of this line of questioning, but did the RABBI on the other end of the phone understand my struggles and longing to be Jewish?  Well how could he? So we talked and I explained why and he allowed me join the class.

The first day of class we all went around introducing ourselves and why we were taking this class.  To my surprise there were several non-Jews marrying Jews taking this class for exactly what the Rabbi was trying to avoid with me and I bet with the others.

So I say Covert Because this is what you feel deep down in the pit of your stomach.  Do it because if you don't you wont be complete.  Do it for yourself.

About Me, Julia "the Puerto Rican Jew"

Hi my name is Julia and this is about my journey to Judaism.  I'm not sure exactly when I decided I wanted to be Jewish, but all I know is I've felt Jewish all my life.  Now coming from a Puerto Rican Christian family it's not the easiest thing to convert let alone tell your family and friends you're thinking about becoming Jewish. 


First let me start by saying not many people understand that "being Jewish" is a religion and not becoming a different person.  I will still be Puerto Rican, like the same foods of my culture, and love Latin music.  Nothing will change about me other than my religious views.


If its hard for YOU to understand why I would want to leave CHRISTIANITY for JUDAISM imagine how I feel.  When I decided to convert it was so difficult.  I felt like I was a traitor, I felt alone and unwanted by the Jewish Community and like I was turning my back on G-d... YES G-d the very G-d I'm seeking in Judaism.  It was a struggle and I cried a lot, but even with all the pain, fear and criticism I knew 100% I wanted to convert and no one or nothing would stand in my way.


I remember talking to my dearest and oldest friend about my decision and she said " you've been Jewish since you were four".  She was the only one that truly understood me and why I was converting.  My boyfriend which happens to be Jewish freaked out.  He was worried my family and friends would think he was pushing me to convert.  I think he was worried if I converted I would expect him to marry me.  Some friends freaked out wondering out loud if I was doing this for "David" the Jewish boyfriend, but most were supportive.


This is my Journey to Judaism and I want to share it with you.